It seems that throughout our marriage we have gone through many different phases.
Before kids, we ALWAYS grocery shopped together, went to the temple twice a month & were ALWAYS together. Christmas was a chance to spoil each other & taking trips was easy. We had 4 glorious years of that.
When we started having children things began to change. Groceries were done by me & the kids, going to the temple went from once a month when we had one child to once every 3 months after having 3 kids. Christmas was about our kids & trips had to be planned out.
My days consisted of naps & doing everything under the sun to keep the kids busy & me sane. Like every other overwhelmed mother, I had many days where I just sat & cried, feeling hopeless.
The last couple of months Culligula & I have noticed that we are now entering into a different phase. A phase that I’m still trying to understand & wrap my head around.
This summer it is once again my turn to take a trip by myself but instead I have chosen to share it with my family. I’m also going to Vegas with my sisters in February & all I can think about is how quickly I can get home to my family. I’ve lost interest in shopping trips to the mall by myself. In fact, I want my kids to go grocery shopping with me. Basically, it is very rare that I want to do anything without my kids or husband.
Now don’t get me wrong, my family isn’t perfect. My boys fight & cry at least 8 times a day. They don’t put things away & they pee on the toilet. They don’t always listen when they’re asked to do something & getting them together to read scriptures every night well, let’s just say I’d rather poke my eyes out.
For right now, we are really enjoying this phase of life. Sleeping in on weekends, playing games with the kids that I actually like, staying out late with the kids & vacations without play pens & formula. We are realizing that this time is precious & it won’t last forever. We don’t want to look back & wish that we would have done it differently. Therefore, we are choosing to make the most of it. One day, they will have their own things going on & I can return to the mall by myself & grocery shopping with Culligula .
9 comments:
That was an entry that was well said. I can see that the same thing is happening to our family. Except our kids try to talk over each other and then they fight. Last night I even told Dave that I felt that I was in a house of teenage girls! I guess I wish I was where you are, appreciating everything. Maybe someday.
What a great post, Pooka. Right now, even though I love my kids so much, I am in that phase of looking for my next escape--into a book or a nap or just out of the house without the munchkins. I love having a baby to snuggle, but they are a lot of work and a huge emotional drain. I look forward to moving more into that next phase. :)
Well put, Pooka. I don't think I'm to that stage yet, but I sure love hearing about how wonderful it is. It makes me want to enjoy my kids more. It sounds like your day together was great yesterday.
Good for you. I'm still in the "I need a break" phase. I would love to spend more time with B-just the 2 of us. Don't get me wrong, when my kids are gone for a week in the summer I miss them and want them home. But for the first day, it's great. I really enjoy a night or day to myself.
Jackie, you're just too cute. Even though I love having a baby around, I am looking forward to the no pack-n-play and diaper phase. At least you still got to go shopping. If you had turned it down completely, I would have requested that you see a doctor.
ah, i haven't visited for so long and when i do you have the most wonderful post. it's so true. we aren't completely there to that stage of life (still in formula and pack 'n plays :)) but i am realizing more and more that there will be a time my boys will choose to do something else - and so i'd better be enjoying every little minute i can, especially since i can't push the "pause life" or "rewind" button. :) thanks for the reminder, and as always, it's nice to "visit"
Pooka you almost made me cry. Your words were inspiaring. I do believe that there are many phases in a family. I'm still in the need to scape phase, but I do know that my kids are growing super fast, so even now I do have days that I prefer to just hang out around the house with them and play games insted of going out or doing something for myself.
I am practically sick with jealousy! Your weekend and your phase of life sounds so great to me. Sometimes it's hard to remember that I chose to go back to playpens and formula . . . But heaven knows you've paid your dues, so go ahead and live it up girl.
i am just blown away at how much we truly have in common.....but i kinda cling to my little family grocery shopping with my husband and kids....its a crazy time but i prefer it that way then alone......its so funny how there are so many time through out the day that i think "i need a break".....but when juan gets home and i have the opportunity to get a trip to the store in .....i run in and out, because that family time is still so special and like you said it will be gone in no time...they will start wanting to do things with out mom and dad.....and its so sad to think how close that time relly is.....I will enjoy my time with my boys that much more now that you have put most of my thoughts and feelings into words......and i can actually realize things more......................thanks for opening up to us all
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